Episode Recap: Whiskey Lullaby

Doc and Dolls have gone a’ snoopin’ for a Moody, whom they find outside what was once the BBHQ (Black Badge Headquarters)…also snoopin’. Moody catches them up on recent developments: Black Badge has discontinued all Ghost River Triangle operations. Not a very good time for paranormal enforcement rollbacks as criminal paranormal activity is on the rise. The Widows have killed a priest in a house of God, and eaten his body al fresco, while seeking the remaining seals that could send them to the other side against their will.  

The Widows, inhabiting the Gardner sister's bodies, have been scheming a way to reopen the portal after the Earps had it stopped up. They need to prolong their stay in Purgatory, and they believe Hypnos, the town clockmaker, can buy them some time. They send Tucker into Hypnos’ place, wave a shotgun around, and force the master of the minutes to work his temporal magic.

And while Wynonna is leading the charge against the still-present demon problem, she’s also still-pregnant and has to figure out how to deal with the two men (Dolls and Doc) she’s been on-again-off-again with…again. Very complicated life she leads. She agrees to meet Dolls at the diner, but before they can talk much about their feelings, Mercedes Gardener (read: Widow) interrupts them with some b.s., and leaves.

Shortly after, Wynonna and everyone else in the diner pass out — for a long, long time. Could the Widows, Hypnos and Tucker have done something to them all? Read: probably. Peacemaker, sensing Wynonna was in danger, woke her up — like a FitBit that saves your life. In the time that’s passed, Earp’s gotten supes pregnant, and is also supes freaking out about it. No time to fret: she wakes up Dolls, Waverly and Nicole, and together they go on a hunt for whoever or whatever put a spell on the town.

Wynonna is poring over Jeremy’s research on where the other seals might be located, when she’s surprised and subdued by the Widows. They run off with Jeremy’s hard work, and leave Wynonna grasping at her stomach. Luckily, Jeremy knows exactly where that seal is — the mind on this kid — and follows his hunch to the basement of Doc’s saloon. He’s right! The saloon, once a Masonic lodge, comes equipped with a hatch that contains the second seal! J-dog, you’re a geek on fleek.

Back at the office, Dolls comes to Wynonna’s rescue…a little too late. He does, however, find out she’s preggers. And that he might be a daddy. Wasting no time for social niceties, explanations, and so forth, Waverly, Dolls and Nicole bust into Hypnos’ pad and find the source of a townwide snoozefest. They can’t kill him, otherwise everyone will die; they’ll need his help to lift the spell, but he wants something in exchange. Tucker took his daughter, and is preparing to carry out his adolescent fantasies with her. If they return her to Hypnos, he’ll play ball.

Back at Shorty’s, Doc, Waverly and Jeremy are enjoying celebratory energy drinks after finding the seal when their party is interrupted by uninvited guests: the Widows. Some gunfire is exchanged, but not for long: the sleeping spell gets the humans (and whatever Doc is) in its snare.

Haught, who’s been tracking Tucker’s phone ever since she caught him snapping depraved pics of the inside of girl's dresses (with the girls in them), is able to find him in a snap. He’s at…the Earp residence, and is trying to get Hypnos’ daughter to role play as…Waverly. Oh, it’s so WEIRD! Nicole interrupts his fun, and shoots him in the shoulder before he escapes out the window.

The Widows have destroyed another of the seals before Wynonna runs in and disrupts the spell with Peacemaker. Bang, bang, shoot ‘em up. The Widows scatter, leaving Wynonna time to inform Potential Baby Daddy #2, Doc, that she’s pregnant. Not surprisingly, he doesn’t take the news so well. Maybe this is a case for Maury Povich.... No need: as Doc later gives Wynonna a letter striking a more promising tone: “I am all in.”  

Wynonna and Dolls return to settle the score with Hypnos. Whether his intentions were pure or not, Dolls shoots the sorcerer, and Wynonna finishes the job with Peaceamaker.  And back at the Gardner palace, the Widows receive an unsettling package at their doorstep: the head of the Stone Witch.