Episode Recap: Remedial Battle Magic

So. Now that Penny has been sent home from the library in the Netherlands with pages about Martin Chatwin, the team gathers around the cottage to discuss their game plan for dealing with The Beast. According to the pages, what they need is the Leo Blade- a knife so powerful it can kill anything, even a God. The problem is, there's just one place to find it. Yep. Fillory.

Since the gang disagrees about what to do next, they do a series of probability spells that all turn out the same way – if they don't try to find a way to kill the Beast, he will turn up and murder everyone. And it will definitely happen within the next week.  But they can't go into Fillory without some serious battle magic. The problem is that battle magic is illegal, and learning it turns out to be impossible unless they know someone who can help them. Turns out, Kady knew quite a bit of battle magic. And so they ask Penny to help them find her.

Penny's having some problems of his own. See, what The Beast wants is to shut off all roads to him, and so he's gotten inside the heads of any traveler. He's created noises to drive them crazy, and it works. Many of the travelers, including Penny's mentor and Joe the Sex Therapist – commit suicide. Penny chooses to do a TON of cocaine and ends up in the infirmary where Professor Sunderland gives him an unapproved device for blocking The Beasts messages.

Meanwhile, the team trying to contact a God decides to work their way up the magical creature food chain until they find someone who can contact a deity. And also? It turns out Julia is special – she's God-touched. She can draw up a spirit faster than the others. While everyone is out trying to find some magical creatures, the team from Brakebills turn up and question Kady about battle magic.  Turns out the way to learn it is to rid yourself of all emotion and give it a very concentrated try. On his way out, Quentin asks how Julia is and Kady asks how Penny is. Short answer? Everyone's got a case of the heartbreaks.

Back at Brakebills, the team put all of their emotions into little shiny vials they wear around their necks. That does the trick! They can all learn battle magic until they have to put their emotions back into their bodies and it's TERRIBLE. These are HUGE feelings that lead Alice and Penny to decide to try and opt for meditation instead. Speaking of feelings, Julia and Kady head off to find a magical creature that is masquerading as Kady's mom. She tells the girls that all the Gods are dead.

Shortly thereafter, Julia prays to a statue and then has a vision of The Lady Underground.  Turns out they're on the right path after all.  But things aren't great for the gang in the woods. After another late night practice session that messed with their emotions, Quentin, Eliot, and Margo get rip roaring drunk and make a pretty serious mistake. When Alice discovers that Quentin had sex with Margo and Eliot, her heart is broken completely. And also? The Beast is still inbound.  Everyone get dressed! You've got work to do!