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Theme Park News: LEGOLAND is going to turn you into a minifigure, for real

By Carlye Wisel
A larger-than-life LEGO figure

Oh, hello there! I haven't been to Disneyland in six days so I am in WITHDRAWAL, people. I have a serious problem! Anyway, there's some fresh news out of LEGOLAND that will, ahem, blow your face off, a few Disney+ tips to guide you through your free time, and plenty of links to keep you busy. Let's get to it:

LEGOLAND IS GOING TO STEAL YOUR FACE

When LEGOLAND New York opens next summer, it'll launch with Bricksburg, an all-new land exclusive to the East Coast park. It's here that guests will be "shrunken" down to the size of a LEGO minifigure — a promise LEGOLAND is making good on, because they will ACTUALLY SCAN YOUR FACE AND MAKE YOU A TINY LEGO BODY.

Yes, like Journey Into Imagination but without the disappointment, the forthcoming LEGO Factory Adventure ride will culminate in a surprise ending with a lifelike presentation of you as a LEGO minifigure, eyeglasses, facial hair, and all. To pull it off, LEGO is utilizing "the world's most advanced motion tracking and facial detection technology," assuring future riders that the on-screen reveal will provide a "shockingly accurate" LEGO version of one's self.

legoland new york

Push those security concerns aside, because I am so inexplicably giddy about this development! I love that years of engineering and software design were all done for the ultimate payoff of making my head look like it was made of plastic. I love the frivolity! I love the technological advancements! And as someone who purchased an American Girl Doll that wasn't Samantha, Addy, or Kirsten but one specifically crafted to look just like me, I LOVE the narcissism that I'll be within the ride. Me!!!!!

LEGOLAND New York boasts that it'll replicate everything from clothing design and color to facial features and accessories within the new ride display, and I absolutely cannot wait to see it.

Does this whole thing sound like the first 10 minutes of a Jurassic Park-like film that will immediately go awry and turn a theme park filled with customers into tiny people trapped in their plastic brick bodies? Yes, it does, and please call upon Chris Miller and Phil Lord to make it, because I want to live within a universe where this exists across all facets of entertainment.

Cannot wait to see this either? LEGOLAND New York opens July 4, 2020 … which, frankly, is not soon enough.

DISNEY+ FOR THE PARKS FAN

Two episodes of The Imagineering Story are now out on Disney+, and if you're not watching, you're missing out. It's a documentary on The Walt Disney Company on The Walt Disney Company's platform, so yes, it skews positive, but it's absolutely lovely. They went harder than they had to, taking viewers inside the Matterhorn basketball court and down into the Magic Kingdom's Utilidors, and I'm counting down the days until Friday's new episode.

BUT, if you're looking to satiate yourself with additional Disney history between weekly episodes, I recommend you take a look-see at Disneyland Around the Seasons. It's a 51-minute reel of vintage parks footage with a peek at It's A Small World's early days and Candlelight Processional and retro Tomorrowland, but none of that matters because you'll want to watch it for the parades.

Don't believe me? Take it from part-time Disneyland resident, Guy Selga:

Fans, including myself, are hoping for more vintage Disney anthology series to pop up on the streaming platform, but according to D23 there's even more insider-y stuff on the way — like a behind-the-scenes look at Animal Kingdom's vast species and a new series, Prop Culture, which dives into the storied objects seen within films like Mary Poppins, TRON, and The Muppet Movie. The second year of Disney+ will even bring a special Ink & Paint series based on Walt Disney Animation's hallowed female artists.

No word on more pups but, hey, can't win them all.

VIDEO OF THE WEEK

This one comes courtesy of @Getterman, who tagged me upon viewing this video, which is the correct reaction. (Thank you again!!) It's the cast of Fantasmic!, Disney's long-heralded nighttime show, performing Fantasmic! In an apartment. Without costumes. Or fireworks. Or absolutely anything other than the kind of positivity and camaraderie that you rarely see outside of college dorm gatherings. Though somewhat inside baseball, it's a pure delight filled with Mickey Mouse choreography and toilet paper waves — and absolutely worth watching.

LINKS! LINKS! LINKS!

- It's official. I'm excited for Frozen II.

- The rhythmic gymnastics episode of Lizzie McGuire is on Disney+, just FYI.

- If you're not hooked on Podcast: The Ride's Downtown Disney District Ordeal, you're doing it wrong.

- Young! Joe! Rohde!!!!

- That's it. We've reached the ultimate point of FOMO.

- Did not realize we've been crushing on Captain America our entire lives!!!

- New at Disneyland: more Star Wars souvenirs!

- Disney Springs just announced its Black Friday offerings.

- Don't expect to land in Orlando without coming face to face with stormtroopers.

- Heading to Disneyland for Christmas? Hotel guests will now have even more time in the parks.

- Mickey & Minnie's Runaway Railway just released a new poster and ... I don't know what it means!